Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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