Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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