dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
