Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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