so explain again why im purple
no
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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