so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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