In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
