I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
is wine microwaveable?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
