Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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