My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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