I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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