Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
