I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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