I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
