Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
