i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
