I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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