Plan B is the new Plan A
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
So squirting runs in the family.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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