Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
