Dual....:-)
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
