what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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