you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
