So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
