And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize