dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
