she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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