good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Randomize
