god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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