The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
