If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize