I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize