rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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