I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize