very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize