Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
