her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
You ate ashes out of my bong
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
