Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I think I have vodka in my lungs
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
