in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
