how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
There's always time for handjobs
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
