Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The air was thick with penises
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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