He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
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