You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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