yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
