HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
