i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
As shirtless as possible
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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