i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
