we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
