A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
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