Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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