This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
