Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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